Before The Crash
by MoonFairyDoll
Summary: (Companion piece for "Crashing Into You". Takes place before Sam visits Blaine.) Sam contemplates telling Blaine about his feelings for him.


Title: Before the Crash  
Author: moonfairydoll (svu-fan-4ever on LJ)  
Fandom: Glee  
Pairing: Blaine/Sam  
Spoilers: Up until episode 4x12.  
Word Count: 1,000+  
Warnings: None  
Summary: (Companion piece for "Crashing Into You". Takes place before Sam visits Blaine.) Sam contemplates telling Blaine about his feelings for him.  
A/N: (Unbeta'ed, so sorry for any errors.) For this let's pretend that Sam is single and Bram isn't a thing, ok?  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm just playing around with these gorgeous boys for a little while.

* * *

Sam goes straight to his room and lies down as soon as he gets home. He excuses himself saying he isn't feeling well and skips dinner. He's not hungry, but not because of some weight loss regimen. Something else haunts his mind today. Something so major, so drastic that it makes him feel giddy and terrified all at once; because today he realized he has a crush.

Yes, Sam Evans has a crush on one of his best friends.

No, it's not Tina or Brittany. Those are the obvious choices and while he thinks they're both gorgeous, they're not where his heart lies. It would be so much simpler if his crush was on either of them, but no. His eyes are set on someone completely unexpected. Someone that took him by surprise and spun his world around in ways he never thought possible. Someone that makes his heart soar and his breath catch in his throat. Someone that makes him laugh in a way no else had been able to before.

He groans and questions how this happened. How did he start crushing on this specific person; of all people? They're just friends, and they're so different in _so_ many ways; yet in others they couldn't be more alike.

He sighs and walks over to where his laptop is perched on his desk. He opens a picture and stares at it for a long while. It's a picture of them - Sam and his crush - which they took before Sectionals. Both dressed in black and gold. They're in a half hug and smiling brightly at the camera. He touches the screen softly and traces his finger throughout his crush's face. Beautiful amber eyes that Sam thinks are magic because of the way they change color throughout the day. From golden brown to green to almost yellow and he stares in awe at their beauty. His finger starts to trace his crush's mouth that's turned up in a gorgeous and genuine smile; a smile that could light not only a room, but the entire world. Sam smiles to himself thinking about this and swears he feels a blush creep through his cheeks.

He closes the laptop and starts pacing around; heart beating fast, hands sweaty, stomach full of butterflies. He starts to feels dizzy and he feels like he's falling; both literally and figuratively. It's in that moment that he allows himself to say it out loud for the first time.

"I have a crush on Blaine!" He exclaims and suddenly saying it out loud makes it all the more real and all the more terrifying.

"Oh my god! The Blonde Chameleon has a crush on Nightbird!" He sounds ridiculous and he knows it, but he can't help himself.

He thinks back to all those weekends spent watching movies and playing video games. All those sleepovers spent just talking about the silliest little things. Like the time he tried to get Blaine to use less hair gel because: "Dude, you look so cool with your hair all wild! Like a rock star!" Only to be met by weary eyes and a: "No, Sam! I look like a fuzz ball without the gel!" He laughs at the memory and thinks about all those little moments where he was able to make Blaine himself laugh with his jokes and his impressions.

And then he wonders how a simple embrace could unleash this tornado of emotions. It was just a simple hug. A hug meant to express all the gratitude he felt for everything Blaine had done for him. They were bros, and he was used to hugging his bros. It wasn't a big deal. But this hug; this _specific_ hug suddenly meant so much more. The second he felt Blaine's body heat so close to his; he felt his heart flutter and his stomach flip. It was as if in that moment the realization of what he really felt for Blaine came crashing through him. He still has no idea how he was able to keep calm for the rest of the afternoon while Blaine helped him with his essay.

"What the hell am I gonna do now?" He questions aloud in the solitude of his room.

Blaine has become his best friend, his confidante, his… well his everything to some extent and he doesn't want to ruin that. Should he tell him about his feelings? Should he risk it all and hope for the best? What if Blaine rejects him? Just because Blaine is gay doesn't mean that automatically he would be interested in Sam that way. And what if he still has feelings for Kurt? What then?

He lies down once more and hugs his pillow. He wonders what Blaine is doing right now? Is he doing his homework? Is he writing some new music? Is he working on a number for Regionals?

"This is ridiculous." Sam states as he gets up and reaches for his phone. He needs to see Blaine, if only to just be in his presence and nothing more.

He types in his message, taps "Send" and waits.

"Here goes; it's all or nothing." He thinks as he decides that if he was going to put his heart on the line he might as well just get it over with.

Blaine replies within minutes and when he receives permission to come over he goes downstairs and tells a fib about how he left a book at a friend's house. He puts on his coat, gloves and a beanie; he grabs his keys and gets in his car.

This is it; the moment of truth. As he puts the key in the ignition he looks at himself in the rearview mirror. He fixes his hair and takes a deep breath as he suddenly remembers one of his favorite quotes. He puts on a brave face and says in his best John Wayne voice: _"Courage is being scared to death... and saddling up anyway."_

And with that in mind he ventures off to Westerville to see his best friend and hopes Blaine won't think he's too weird for feeling the way he feels. Because in the end all he wants is for them to remain friends no matter what.


End file.
